1. Long Timers
For those of you who have been doing VDay together for years and are still excited to get dressed up and spend the evening alone sitting opposite each other enjoying the front row seat into each other’s eyes over candlelight centerpiece: cheers to you!!! Seriously! But to those people in long-term relationships who are so over the overbooked restaurant reservations and big fuss, I beg of you: please don’t ignore this day altogether. Although you do things for each other every single day to contribute and help out, this is a special day to go totally out of your way to make a gesture that doesn’t just say “I’m in this” but instead “I’m in this with you because you are a precious gift in my life and so I offer this gift to you.” Surprise them with something small to show your appreciation, like neatly organizing their underwear drawer or picking up their favorite treat or bottle of wine on the way home or fixing something of theirs that has been broken for a long time that they haven’t gotten around to.
2. New Flames
This is a time when you tend to want to be extravagant. You just made your relationship official and want to prove to them that they will not regret this decision. Your first step will be this: ask. Yes, you should still ask this person on the date you are planning, even though you may have already assumed you would be together on this night. Assumptions will mean the failure of many relationships, especially on this day of the year. If you are thinking a swanky dinner or event package, plan ahead. Buy the tickets. Rsvp. Now. Don’t wait until the last minute to have yours and their expectations plummet.
Had your eye on a certain someone for a while now? Been too nervous or unmotivated to do anything about it? Has it been eating at you every night before you sleep or every morning on your way to work? VDay is the perfect excuse to ask them out because it doesn’t have to be a big deal. Just say “Everyone deserves to have a Valentine” and they will not feel caught off guard. They will feel unintimidated and casual about it, which has a plus and a minus. This is a good thing because the comfortability and spontaneity will entice them to say yes more easily than normal. However, since they see it as a one-time thing, you must really impress if you want to change their preconceived notion. Even if this person gives you a chill and casual vibe, you’ve got to make the most of it. If you just want to have coffee, skip Dunkin and take them to your most favorite cafe to add that little sprinkle of intimacy and honest insight into who you are. Your apartment is an absolute N-O for this first date on this day. VDay is way too romantic to force someone to be confronted with the should-I-sleep-here-tonight question.
4. Main Things
This is the couple that has been seeing each other for a while but are not totally committed. On VDay you are faced with the decision to either show out and make that next step, or choose the status quo and keep things the way they are… stop holding back. Ditch your pride and make this a day to remember. Whether or not you are ready to commit afterwards, this person is obviously special to you and that is all that VDay is about. So for this one day, show you care by taking a stroll around town or gifting them a small charm or sexy lingerie piece. Keep it fun and adventurous just like your emotionally distant relationship, but add some class. This is a day that could make or break y’all, if you want it to. Take them to a place that has been meaningful to your relationship thus far to show that you remember and hold near to you the time you have spent together – the place you first met, the movie they have been talking about wanting to see for weeks, an exercise or other class you have joked about trying together. Think hard.
5. Sometimes Lovers
This is the person you have seen a handful of times and are interested in, but don’t see a future with necessarily. I honestly don’t classify this type of relationship as date-worthy, so you don’t have to worry about this if you don’t want to. But, should you be a hopeless romantic like the rest of us, appropriate dates might include cooking dinner at home to provide an amicable night of conversation and uninhibited time for bonding. Dress it up a little though. Invite them under the pretense of formal attire.
6. Ex Valentines
Sometimes lovers of the past linger in our minds when no one else has yet filled that place. While relationships come to an end, personal connections, especially intimate ones, really are forever. That is just a fact of life, but whether you choose to act upon it is entirely up to you. History can be forgotten, but never erased. If you have someone you used to know or love whom you want to honor on VDay, then that is perfectly understandable and a humane gesture on your part. Take them out for dessert today in the middle of the day to avoid prolonged stay. Simply offer them a surprise pick-me-up to show that you still care and always will.